Greetings True Christians (and heathen scum)!
Did you know that Jesus Christ attempted to save Richard Dawkins just yesterday? That’s right, boys and girls. Well-known atheist author Richard Dawkins was hit with a stroke, but our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ healed him and allowed him to survive. Why? So that Jesus Christ could save him and lead him to heaven, just like Jesus Christ saved Christopher Hitchens on his deathbed.
Richard Dawkins has spent his life as a horrid heathen writing books like the God Delusion and espousing his belief that aliens created life on Earth. He has engaged in war against God, but Jesus wants to save him and lead him to conversion. Why? Because Christ has the power to save all sinners. Just as Jesus Christ converted Christian-hater Saul (who became Paul) and used him for spreading the word of God, so too does Jesus want to save Dawkins and use him for spreading God’s word.
Why Dawkins? Why didn’t the Lord just let him die and send him straight to hell to be tortured forever by demons? Jesus can work miracles through broken vessels such as Dawkins. Just as Dawkins has spent his life attacking Christians, so, too, did Saul in Acts of the Apostles. After Christ blinded and restored his sight, Saul became Paul and spent the rest of his life spreading the word of God. Now it is Dawkins’ turn to be saved.
Richard Dawkins, today we challenge you to embrace Christ’s presence in your life and show gratitude for the fact that Jesus has healed you. Know that the Lord has allowed you to be afflicted on the birthday of Charles Darwin, and also know that it was Jesus, and not Darwin, that healed you of your stroke. If you embrace Christ today, you will be able to spend an eternity in heaven. If you reject Christ until your death, you will surely burn in hell forever. Make the right choice. We will be praying for you.
Jim Solouki and Martin Baker