Join us in the war against Darwin’s Day!

Greetings True Christians (and heathen scum)!

Did you know that February 12th is the birthday of American hero Abraham Lincoln? Did you know that it is also the birthday of Hitler’s hero Charles Darwin? Do you know which person the atheists want to celebrate on February 12th? That’s right boys and girls, they reject the true American hero Abraham Lincoln and want to declare February 12th as Darwin Day, much like they do every year. This is an affront against God and against America, and it must be stopped. Martin and I are writing letters to churches and editors across America, and would like you to join us. We will include one of our letters below. Please share it with your friends, your children, your teachers, your parents, and your pastors. Here is our letter:

Dear friends,

Across America, atheists are writing letters to Congress urging America to pass resolutions recognizing February 12th, 2015, as Darwin Day.On the surface, this seems like a celebration of science. However, when we look at the facts, it is something far worse. 

Darwin’s theory is false, even he knew that. Charles Darwin said, in reference to the eye, that to assume that it evolved through his mechanism was “absurd to the highest degree.”  No true missing link has ever been found by the evolutionists. No “transitional fossils,” no observed evolution. The Darwin myth is an emperor with no clothes.

Darwin’s theory is responsible for many of the evils in the world. Darwin’s work is directly responsible for Hitler’s racial theories, eugenics, segregation, and genocide. A belief in Darwin leads to agnosticism, atheism, and other ill-advised paths. Darwinists constantly try to hide all opposition by denying all who question Darwin a voice. Just watch Ben Stein’s Expelled. Question Darwin in an academic setting, and you will be expelled from academia.

It is time to reject the celebration of Darwin Day. Perhaps we can instead celebrate true academic freedom on February 12th. Let us allow our students to ask questions, even if those questions make the scientists uncomfortable! Or we can celebrate a real American hero on February 12th. February 12th is also the birthday of Abraham Lincoln. Let us make February 12th Abraham Lincoln Day instead of Darwin Day. It’s time to banish Darwin to the rubbish bin of history. Let’s start by bringing an end to Darwin Day.

Your friends,

Jim Solouki and Martin Baker.

9 thoughts on “Join us in the war against Darwin’s Day!

  1. 10bacon says:

    Hitler was a Christian. Oh, that’s right. You already knew that, being atheist scum and all.

  2. I know this is satire but Darwin actually felt bad about the lies that he had caused to be told. He had speculated that we came from monkeys. But this is why Darwin felt bad: they took his theory, including the monkey part that he rejected, and ran with it. And they ran with it the other way. Hitler “embraced” Darwin’s theory but it’s like when Christians “embrace” the gospel instead of embracing it. His understanding of the theory was wrong, and Darwin knew even before he died that he was responsible for that, because his theory was correct, but he made some speculations that people accepted as facts before he realized they were wrong. The rest is actually true. but not the monkey part. We did not come from monkeys.

    • Alienfan says:

      Indeed. We do not come from monkeys. But we share a common ancestor(if I spelled that right. Which I probably didn’t)

      • 10bacon says:

        I believe we share 99% of the DNA of chimpanzees.

      • No, Austrolopitheces didn’t exist. But that’s good to point out that that’s what the theory of evolution ACTUALLY says. That particular portion Darwin rejected later. The rest is true as far as we know it. But humans were created as humans, and have no ancestors evolutionwise. Just Adam and Eve. While we have evolved to a degree (there were freaking GIANTS in the Bible, that’s totally evolution) we didn’t evolve FROM anything. And certainly our species has not changed species over time or introduced a new species, unless you’re the type who thinks the Sasquatch is descended from Cain, and then yes, if Sasquatch was real and Cain was its ancestor, that would have been macroevolution on man’s part. But I don’t believe that. Am I confusing anyone?

      • We share about 50% of our DNA with a banana, and i’m eating one right now.

        Oh dear…

  3. Cassandra von d’Nacht says:

    Who cares! What ought to be more worrisome to the American public is this:

  4. Even if its true, so what? Also, I though Hitler’s birthday was April 20.
    Also, you’re letter is bullshit and you know it. Face it, your a poe. Just admit it, and… actually you’re not that funny.

  5. V͙̳̰̠̳̟̈́͝o̻̲̯͕͇͖ͤͤ̈́͂̀t͉̩̲̪̘͎͚̋ͬͭe̘̺̬̟̭͉̳ͮ̚ ̖Cͣͧ̿ͮ̌t͇͚̯̭̞̥͞ͅh̖͉̪̫̹̭ͤ͊ͫụ͖̞͙̑͌̅l̙̰̪̖͊̚̕huͧ͆̍ͦ͂͋҉̪͖̯͇̠ ͎̼̳̱̪ͩͫ͂͛͂2͙͙̬͇0͖̣̮̠̞̭̱1̵͍̭̇͌ͭ̔̽̾̎6̷͔̗͇̮!̷͍̤͍̮̙̦ͥ͛ͧ!͖̍́ͪ

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