Bobby Keys in Hell!

this is where Bobby Keys is now!

Greetings True Christians!

Today, Rolling Stones Saxophone Player was cast eternally into the fires of Hell for his sins against God and God’s people. He was a rock and roll musician who put sexuality and fame before Christ, and died as a very wealthy sinner. Does everyone remember what Jesus said about wealth? Let’s look at Matthew 19:24:

And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.“—JESUS!

So there you have it boys and girls. Keys’ wealth in itself was enough to condemn to an eternity in Hell! But that’s not all he wrote! Bobby Keys was also extremely sexually unchaste, having engaged in countless orgiastic pleasure-filled debaucheristic parties with fellow sinner Keith Richards. Keys had sex outside of wedlock with many women, and that’s called adultery! God has a special place set aside for adulterers. It’s called Hell.

Bobby Keys was also a rock and roll musician, which automatically qualifies him for a one way ticket to Hell. Rock and roll music is the devil’s music and must be avoided at all costs! When he wasn’t playing with the Rolling Stones, Bobby Keys played saxophone for John Lennon, who imagined no religion and is now imagining what heaven must be like from his place of eternal torment in Hell.

Let the death of Bobby Keys be a warning upon all of those who are unsaved. Repent now. Tomorrow may be too late. Accept Jesus and go to Heaven, or reject Him and go to Hell. The choice is yours. The only way to heaven is to be born again in the blood of Christ. Again, the only way to heaven is to be born again! Choose heaven, choose Jesus. Even if you repent upon your deathbed like Christopher Hitchens did, you will find your way into heaven if it is done with a pure heart. But if you live a life of sin and die in sin like Bobby Keys did, you will be cast into Hell to burn with Darwin, Carl Sagan, Robin Williams, the Popes, and Hitler!

Repent America, repent! Reject all rock and roll bands!

Yours in Christ,

Jim Solouki

44 thoughts on “Bobby Keys in Hell!

  1. StonesFan says:

    What is wrong with you?

  2. The Illogical Reaper says:

    You know what, every time you make a post like this, you prove my point; Atheists have more empathy then Theists, or at least christians. Which, by the way, is one of the things that is accosted with morality. Let me ask you one question, just one: Is there anything “satanic”, but if you tried to remove it, your life, or the life of everyone, would change for the worst?

    • you need to repent and accept Jesus or burn in Hell. Turn or burn reaper. the choice is yours. I’ll be praying for you.

      Yours in Christ,

      Jim Solouki

      • The Illogical Reaper says:

        “Repent to Jesus, or burn in hell fire.”
        “Give me your money, or I’ll shoot you”
        Fuck you! First of all, stop threating us with hellfire! Second, your entire site is summed up with “The bible says its right, therefore ita right!”
        I love how people claim that were athiests to avoid sin, when really, its you, the christian, who uses Jesus and the Holy Spirit to justify your actions!
        Think before you speak, asshole!

      • Hope you enjoy barbecuing in Hell. Turn or Burn friend, turn or burn. Heaven is like a gulf club for God! Unsaved unwelcome. Repent or your’e headed for hell.

      • The Illogical Reaper says:

        You’re god is a tyrant, who set up a rigid system in the world. The problem is that you are to caught up in his “presence” that you can’t see it. I will say this now; “repent and burn” is not an argument, its a threat. It might work on some poor sod, but it will not work on me. So, why don’t you repent from your asshole ways, and see the light on non-belief.

  3. Jessica Ca says:

    why would you even say something like that. Your not God you don’t know if he is in Haven or Hell.

  4. Cassandra von d’Nacht says:

    You are always writing about heaven and hell, but not about purgatory. Who then, according to you, ‘True Christians’, goes there, then?

  5. 10bacon says:

    Where in the Bible does it say, specifically, that Rock and Roll is Satanic? Is Christian Rock Satanic? Is the entire band U2 going to Hell.

    I don’t know why I’m posting as this site is bullshit.

    • The Illogical Reaper says:

      Bullshit doesn’t even scratch the surface. Its more like every species that exists, and ceases to exist, took a gigantic dump. That dump is this website.

      • You heathen scum! You are going to be barbecued in the fires of hell for all eternity unless you repent immediately! Repent or burn! repent or burn!

        I will be praying for you.


      • The Illogical Reaper says:

        Do you have anything better to say. ANYTHING! Proof that there’s a god, Proof Jesus was alive, ANYTHING except “Repent or Burn”?! I thought by now you would have learned that that doesn’t work on me, Jim. Insanity is doing that same thing over and over, expecting different results.

      • Tiia says:

        For some reason I enjoy reading these articles. I need some good laugh before going to sleep. And who else would make me laugh harder than a pathetic hallucinating bigot? ^^

      • Tiia, you are going to burn in the fires of hell! I will pray for you so that you will repent. Otherwise you will burn. Turn or burn, its as simple as that. –Jim Solouki

      • Cassandra von d’Nacht says:

        Couldn’t agree more with both of you!!! At some point I was beginning to this this blog may be a ‘social experiment’ of some sort, to see others’ reaction to these topics and nonsense, but after reading comments of St Jim Sôloüki and St Martin Bäkker, I am afraid they are not quipping. If they are going to heaven, after all, I would choose hell immediately. Who wants to spend their eternal afterlife listening to them?! Probably not even their God himself.

      • 10bacon says:

        That’s the thing, Casssandra. I can’t tell exactly. The previous post about retailers going to Hell was so stupid that it made me question the validity of Jim and Martin. I guess I have too much faith in humanity that people would be as monumentally stupid as Jim and Martin.

      • friend, we are a real site doing the work of the Lord. we are as legitimate as Jesus. We care about your immortal soul and do not wish to see you join the other sinners in hell. repent or burn friend, repent or burn.

        Yours in Christ,

        Jim Solouki

      • The Illogical Reaper says:

        Heres something else I dont get: Levinicus said that gays should be put to death, but also said we should NOT mix fabrics. Ether follow ALL the rules of the book, or follow NONE of them.

      • gays SHOULD be put to death unless they repent, and my shirt is 100% cotton you heathen.

        repent or burn.

      • Also, my reply was a slight jest, but you do realize that Jesus rendered some of the old laws unnecessary with His ministry on earth, correct? You’d think these fools, such as yourself, have never truly understood Christianity! Oh yeah, I forgot, you just blindly reject it without knowing the Truth. Turn or burn friend, turn or burn.

        yours in Christ,

        Jim Solouki

      • The Illogical Reaper says:

        You’re doing it again. Use something besides “repent or burn.” Anyways, I do not blindly deny the existance of god, I just fail to believe it. If given the right evidence, I’ll become a dietist. The problem comes when you expect me to follow your cult with faith alone. I assume Jesus hates skepticism?

      • Yes, exactly. You think Mormonism is a cult? Buddy, get a load of this guy.

      • 10bacon says:

        If you truly are legitimate, than I’m going to give you some help. If you would be able to debate the issues they bring up, but you don’t do that. All you do is say that they are going to burn. If God made all us, he made me how I am. He made me need more proof than some dude saying on a website’s rantings. Most of what you post is a combination of ridiculousness and over-simplification of Christianity. There is zero depth in the wonders of God that you say you believe in. You reek of a “believer” who “believes” only because they were raised in some backwoods church. You would be more effective if you realized all people are flawed, including you and Martin, and that there is considerably more grey in humanity than black and white as you would have your readers believe.

        Basically, it comes down to you needing to discover who Christ really was as you embody zero traits that are attributed to him.

        However, I still don’t buy you legitimacy. Saying “we’re as legitimate as Christ” makes you sound like your mocking atheists.

  6. samo5826 says:

    Great post Jim. Reject all rock!

  7. When Jesus said it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, He was exaggerating. He also made a joke with Peter’s name. Look it up. The point is, riches aren’t a sin, but greed, loving riches more than God, making it your goal in life to be rich, that is not a sin. If you are righteous, God will provide for your needs. Look at Job. He was rich. was he wicked because he was rich? No. Was he righteous because he was rich? No. Was he rich because he was righteous? Yes. He was blessed for being a devoted servant of the Lord. And when he lost everything, God gave him seven times as much as he had for his faithfulness. That sounds like a lot of money and wealth. Or just wealth in general. Surely if you are right and riches are sinful, Job is burning in hell for being a righteous man who did not complain when the devil was allowed to torment him. Which was not a punishment, by the way, as his friends believed. The book of Job disproves some of your arguments right there. Want more?

    • Martin Baker says:

      Wrong! Jesus made it clear that he was not exaggerating. Think about why Michael Jackson and other Rock ‘n Roll sinners are in HELL!

    • Vid says:

      Did you read the BIBLE and learn why the Lord spoke a lot of Parables?
      Why did you curse and twist the words of GOD by saying Parable is exaggerating?

       “As a translation of the Hebrew word מָשָׁל mashal the word Parable can also refer to a Riddle.”

      Your argument about “Job” shows that you did not understand at all.
      Job was a righteous man, worked hard and obeyed GOD. SATAN wanted to prove GOD that Job will renounce GOD if Job became poor and/or faced sufferings. GOD said NO. Since SATAN insisted, then GOD let SATAN tested Job making Job severely suffered but one thing GOD told to not kill Job. Job’s wife tod him to curse GOD, he refused. At the end SATAN was defeated. So GOD Blessed Job 7 times more. Job passed the Spiritual battle against evils.


      • Okay. What I meant was, it’s not a sin to be rich, and that’s not what Jesus meant. I am pretty sure the riddle was hyperbole, but yes, I will except your argument. I was not “cursing,” merely stating that the Savior employed hyperbole. It is not as difficult as getting a camel through the eye of a needle for a man to get to heaven. Surely you agree with me on that. And I understand the story of Job, I also understand he had many temporal and spiritual blessings, correct? Nothing you said strikes me as incorrect, leaving me as to what your argument actually is. Do you mean to say Job was not rich? Because certainly he was wealthy if not rich. Rich is only relative to monetary value, while wealth can mean any number of possessions as well as spiritual gifts. Please educate me on what your point is besides the use of the term “exaggerate,” which has a negative connotation but I believe is synonymous with hyperbole, the use of which in parables is not a crime. Come to think of it, I do not recall that statement being part of a parable, although there was symbolism to a degree in it. I have read the context of the passage and cannot find the parable.

      • By the way, since Jesus spoke in riddles, I do not believe he literally meant that going to heaven is impossible for the rich. I believe this:
        Riches are a gift from God and a reward for hard work.
        Riches are not more important than God.
        Therefore, if you are commanded to give them up, then you should do so.
        Jesus commanded the rich man to give his riches up.
        The important thing is not that he did it (which he didn’t) but that he would (which he wouldn’t have.) If you would give up your riches for God, that is sufficient. But if you are commanded to give up your riches, and you have no problem giving them up in the service of God, then you should be able to give up your riches. Therefore, if God asks you to give up your riches, and He might, then give them up. But if he doesn’t, be prepared to. That is what counts, because if you are truly able to say that you love your God more than your riches, then you will be able to use that wealth he has given you to do great things in his service. And for your service you will be rewarded, whether it be with long life, or with wisdom, or a place in heaven or more riches, because you were able to, and, if the Lord commanded you, did, give up your riches. It’s like the story of Abraham and Isaac. Did Abraham want to kill Isaac? No. Would he have? Yes, because he was a faithful servant of God. Now, God did not want Abraham to kill his son. But what if Abraham was rich? The Lord could have asked him to sell his possessions and give all his money to the poor, and the Lord might not have meant it as a test. That would mean that Abraham would have gone through with it, and that is what counts. I am not saying that it is less important to give up your riches as it is to be able to. I am saying that if you are able to, then you will if you are required to, and doing that counts. My point is riches are not evil. Look at the wise men who visited Jesus. Surely they were wealthy men. Were they wicked?

        PS– Are you the same religion as these guys? Because you are a lot smarter than them. You should ask them to let you take over for them. You actually know how to defend the Christian faith.

  8. The Illogical Reaper says:

    So, how much longer will it be before you realize that the threats of hellfire don’t work? You need to come up with something better. I know its very hard for you to do since it requires a functioning brain, but THINK!

    • Martin Baker says:

      Hell is real! You are blinded by the atheist mindset that is made possible by Satan. You need to repent!

    • Vid says:

      Human sinners can threat you or any one with hell fire will never work. Because they too are not sure where they will be sent. However, ONE who is Above all who has all Authorities is the Judge and He is Jesus Christ, the Living GOD. And you must think, your body will be decayed but your soul lives on. In eternal hell fire or heaven, it’s up to you to choose your path before your death.

  9. Exactly how is rock satanic if the lyrics are clean and the musicians are Christian? I’m not saying all rock bands are like that but come on. Not every rocker is a satanist.

    • The Illogical Reaper says:

      In mostc chritians’ minds, it works like this: Does it pander to my religion? Does it glorify my god? Does it unintentionally reference the bad things from the bible? If you answered no to the first 2, and yes to the thrid, then you are satanic and are going to hell.

  10. Vid says:

    I am just a miserable sinner, I am nothing or not better than any body.
    I just wanted to share my background and how I came to know Jesus Christ, the living GOD. I was an orphan child, all my family members, some were killed and some died by starvations while Communist Pol Pot took over. My native country (Cambodia) was a Buddhist nation, not many heard or knew True GOD, they worshiped and still worshiping Buddha as their god. So many miracles I received, … then The Lord Jesus finally revealed Himself to me. I was just a small nameless, faceless Buddhist child, why did The Lord Jesus save me from death and starvations, and I did not know Him?
    I was very sick dying, He healed me. I was starving with no food, He fed me. I was walking in the area of mine field, so many bodies were blown, and I was standing amoung the victims and the dead without harm. I was walking with other old people days and nights with no food and water, but I was not hungry nor thirthy until I reached the refugee camp. I still did not want to know the Lord. I had not faced troubles, a few families wanted to adopt me. I had a good life and went to schools then University GWU. Still I did not follow the Lord, I followed my country men by attending Buddhist temple instead. I kept running away from HIM.
    However, the Lord our GOD is the GOD of love and patient… finally I stopped running from HIM, then I follow Him and accepted to carry the Cross with Him after many dreams and visions.

    This is my very short story life how an orphan Buddhist child was saved by GOD, the Lord Jesus Christ.

    Anyone of you don’t believe me I don’t care, The Lord Jesus is my G8D, my Fathet, my witness, my Savior. I cannot pay back what the Lord gave me, only to do the WILL/Words of GOD in the BIBLE. I judge No One, but to speak what I have learnt from the words of GOD in the Bible. I am Christian (Catholic denomination).

    Glory to GOD/Jesus and His Mighty Name.


    • Vid says:

      Typo, sorry.
      Correct version.

      “Anyone of you don’t believe me I don’t care, The Lord Jesus is my GOD, my Fathet, my witness, my Savior. I cannot pay back what the Lord gave me, only to do the WILL/Words of GOD in the BIBLE. I judge No One, but to speak what I have learnt from the words of GOD in the Bible. I am Christian (Catholic denomination).

      Glory to GOD/Jesus and His Mighty Name in the Higest”.


  11. When did Richard Dawkins die?

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