Greetings True Christians!
Do you hear those thundering footsteps as they run towards the buffet? Can you hear the screams of terror as normal people step away? Here comes Honey Boo Boo, Satan’s youngest toy. Every time she eats more food, Lucifer laughs with joy.
My brothers and sisters in Christ, God hates Honey Boo Boo and her mother. They are both known gluttons, and obesity is sinful. Have you ever seen a fat servant of God? I’m willing to bet the answer is no. Gluttony is sinful and it keeps needed food away from the starving children who need it most. Honey Boo Boo’s mother is clinging to earthly pleasures in this world by incessantly pushing food into her daughter’s mouth, and is leading herself and her family to an eternity in Hell.
Do you know what the Bible says about people who lead their children into sin? Let’s take a look at Mark 9:42. “Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea.” Those are the words of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ! If I was Honey Boo Boo’s mother, I would be deeply afraid. The Bible is clear, she is headed for an eternity in the lake of fire.
And that’s just because of the food! Not to mention, her and her family have sold out to create an ungodly and evil “reality TV” series! This series glorifies obesity, the sinfulness of Hollywood, and the use of dating sites! Do you know what non-Christian dating sites are? They are one of Satan’s most productive playgrounds. These sites bring people together for incessantly sinful ungodly bouts of fornication and adultery, and all who participate receive a one way ticket to HELL, lest they repent.
This evil, ungodly show also glorifies a satanic and evil creation called “go go juice,” which is used by Honey Boo Boo’s lard-infused mother to prepare her daughter for beauty pageants. This juice includes a mixture of Red Bull (which, remember, is a drink inspired by Satan and communism) and Mountain Dew. Beauty pageants are Satanic too, because they glorify sex instead of glorifying the Lord. While these pageants judge on shallow things, the Bible judges on Godly things. “Go go juice” sounds like something that you might find for sale at an ungodly den of iniquity served up by some whores of Babylon in Las Vegas!
Honey Boo Boo also glorifies homosexuality! In one episode she says that there is “nothing wrong with being a little gay.” Honey, you’re misguided. Homosexual acts are an abomination to God, and God hates homosexuality. Homosexuals, much like nonrepentent atheists, Catholics, Hindus, Mormons, Muslims, and other heathens, are headed straight to Hell. Repent or you’ll burn too!
TV shows such as Here Comes Honey Boo Boo teach our children that it is ok to eat in excess and to ignore God’s law! They teach our children that it is ok to place an emphasis on sexuality and not on Jesus! We must remove this ungodly television show from our networks and take back the airways for Christ. We must send Honey Boo Boo and her family back to the woods of wherever, and replace their television series with good, old fashioned, Godly entertainment. Let us take back the networks for Jesus! Let’s take back the TV for Christ!
From your friends,
Jim Solouki and Martin Baker
Vote for Rick Santorum, God’s choice for President in 2016!