Rick Rolled by Jesus

Dear Christian friends,

You’ve just been Rick Rolled. Let me take this moment to remind you of the following:

Jesus is never going to give you up.

Jesus is never going to let you down.

Jesus is never going to run you around, or desert you.

Jesus is never going to make you cry.

Jesus is never going to say goodbye.

Jesus is never going to tell a lie and hurt you….

….That is, of course, if you accept His sacrifice on the Cross at Cavalry and are born again in Him.  Jesus died for all of our sins. We need only accept His sacrifice to enter into Paradise.

So join me, and step through Heaven’s gate. Don’t believe Heaven is real? Here’s a picture of God Himself opening the door to Paradise:

 

Dear friends, Heaven is real. And once you step through that holy gate, God will take care of you for all eternity. He loves you. He loves you. He loves you and I and everyone. But we must accept His love i we are to join Him in Paradise. Please won’t you accept a one way ticket to Paradise and accept Jesus?  I know Jesus, and I think you should too.

 

Be cool with Christ. Make Jesus your homeboy.

 

Yours in Christ,

Jim

33 thoughts on “Rick Rolled by Jesus

  1. weerd0 says:

    You do know that image is photoshopped right?

    • It was to make a point. Sigh.

      • weerd0 says:

        And yet you presented it as evidence. Im sorry you post all of this crazy stuff so im not sure when you actually post things as an example. Perhaps next time you could hang a lantern on it?

      • Perhaps. I’ll hang a proverbial lantern on my metaphorical posts from now on.

      • thewhyteman says:

        Also you should now that this picture is a meme. It is called goatse.
        It comes from a pic of a man stretching out his own anus so much that he can fit all 8 fingers around the rim.

        So if you knew what everyone else knew, (and you are really not a troll) you’d know that you made the reference that you enter heaven through god’s anus. Which if you read the bible seems quite fitting.

      • I have no idea what this goatse thing is. I’ve never heard of it. The image to me just suggests an image of God opening heaven for us.

  2. So Jesus is everywhere, except physically next to me?

  3. ……… And yet you do not trust what scientists say. Because they are of the devil and the theologians are not. right?

  4. “Jesus is never going to tell a lie and hurt you….

    ….That is, of course, if you accept His sacrifice on the Cross at Cavalry and are born again in Him.”

    WOW! What a DEMONIC faith you hold! Jesus is this angry, overly insecure deity who completely goes BERSERK when someone doesn’t believe in him! BERSERK ENOUGH TO TORTURE HIM IN HELL?!?

    If you’re Jesus is real, then “DIE JESUS DIE!”

    • Repent heathen! I command Satan to come out of you and to stop forcing you to blaspheme. In the name of our Lord and Savior Jesus the Christ, who was crucified and sacrificed for our sins so that the evil one might be defeated, I call the demon out of you. May you be cleansed by the cleansing power of the sacrificial lamb. May the light of Christ lead you away from the darkened blasphemous state that you are drowning in as we speak. I pray that you may be cleansed and born again in the blood of Christ.

      Amen.

  5. hey, what’s the matter? you hasn’t responded to my questions–difficult to answer right? because you’re not a catholic.

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